It’s a cliché to talk about couples who finish each other’s sentences. The Atlanta Symphony Orchestra’s principal bass player, Ralph Jones, and associate principal bass Gloria Jones, who will have been married for 28 years this May, finish each other’s musical phrasing.
“We have the same concept of how long or short something should be,” says Gloria, 48. “We really blend …”
“… and sometimes, I see her doing things, and I’ll say, ‘Hey, that’s good!’ adds Ralph, 66.
“And vice-versa,” Gloria says. Because the first and second chair double bass, one of several couples in the orchestra, really do finish each other’s sentences, too.
In addition to Ralph and Gloria, quite a few orchestra members are exchanging valentines in this month of love. Others include Lisa and Mark Yancich (she: first violin section, he: principal timpani, married a few months after Ralph and Gloria); Juan and Carol Ramirez (both in the first violin section); principal flute Christina Smith and associate principal flute Robert Cronin; and the violin section’s Judith Cox and Raymond Leung.
There’s a symbiosis in orchestra couples. For one, musicians keep both long and unusual hours. Whether rehearsing, performing or traveling, “we’re working when everyone else is off, and off when everyone else is working,” says Ralph. At the same time, he says, they count themselves lucky: They are following their one true calling. “It’s passionate work,” says Gloria, “and our passions are attuned.”
After a beat, Ralph adds, “And it helps that we get along really well.”
Principal oboe player Liz Koch, 25, and trumpeter Mike Tiscione, 32, sit nowhere near each other, but the biggest challenge of their relationship thus far involved a question of whether to stay in the same state as well as the same stage.
The two began dating in February 2010, and things got serious quickly. By April, they were flying to Italy’s Amalfi Coast to meet Liz’s extended family. “Everyone in the orchestra joked,” says Liz, “‘you’re going on your honeymoon before you’re even engaged!’”
That honeymoon ended, however. Weeks before they started dating, Mike had accepted a position with the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra and, in August 2010, he left. Then came the visits. “Really,” says Liz, “I should go back and look at my Delta records, because I swear, I visited him something like 15 times in 12 months.” As time passed, neither could deny it: Their relationship was serious. Finally, it was decided. The ASO had granted Mike a leave of absence, giving him months to decide whether he wanted to depart permanently. After a year, he knew he wanted to come back. And so he did.
“In the end, we had an opportunity, which I think is unique, which is for both of us to play professionally in positions we really like, and in a place that can support us. We had that here in Atlanta,” he says.
Now, says Liz, “we just look forward to everything.” The wedding’s planned for August.
Liz and Mike aren’t the only orchestra couple who’ve faced challenges. On May 7, 2010, Ralph Jones was diagnosed with Stage 4 tongue cancer. The following months were filled with aggressive chemotherapy, surgery, radiation and the tough challenges that come with a devastating illness. Gloria recalls standing alone in their kitchen one day, the refrigerator and counter overflowing with casseroles from their music and church communities. “And I just stood there, crying,” she says. “It was partially from gratitude, but partially from frustration. With his cancer, Ralph had a feeding tube. He couldn’t eat any of this.”
Even when things looked grim, the couple somehow maintained their sense of humor — displaying Ralph’s rubber radiation hospital mask on the wall at Christmastime, for example, and topping it with fake antlers and a red nose. The latest news is positive: A checkup in December revealed Ralph to be six months cancer-free.
In the meantime, the experience has changed them. “I’m much less critical now,” says Ralph. “Life’s too short. I look for the good.” For her part, Gloria says cancer has a way of stripping a relationship to its most basic. “And that’s friendship. A really good friendship. If there’s a secret to a good relationship, that’s it. Every day onstage, I’m turning pages for him.”
“Aw, come on!” complains Ralph, all false pique. “I’m turning them once in a while!”
“He turns them sometimes, yes!” Both laugh. “But orchestra etiquette is: I turn them. Anyway, we get along well. Very well!”
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Kate Sweeney is a radio producer and freelance writer who lives and works in Atlanta. See more of her work at www.katesweeney.net.
